Because I love cats, people have always gotten me cat statues or cat posters for gifts. They’ll say: “Here, this made me think of you.” This tradition has resulted in my perfectly rational hatred of cat statues and posters. I have become afraid of letting anyone know how much I like cats, lest they give me a ceramic cat for Christmas.

Now, I should note that I don’t try to hide my deep and melting love of felines from sensible people – just the ones who know me so poorly that a ceramic cat seems like a good idea. For example, Chris (a friend of ours) got me a bobble-head Kuroneko-sama from Trigun one year. This was, of course, an acceptable gift because it was a cat from an anime that we all watched as a group. It had meaning and memories behind it. (Plus it was dang cute.) Chris knew that I liked anime and that I liked Kuroneko-sama and he took appropriate action.

This brings me to the real point of the ceramic cats – why, when you get married, do people give you all sorts of things to put on tables, but never give you any tables? I’ve found, as we have unpacked, that we have more useless things to go on surfaces than we have surfaces. Partly, this is because I didn’t sign up for any furniture, because we had a furnished apartment when we got married. But the other thing is that people think that getting you something that they especially picked out for you is better than getting you something you’ve asked for. Like it’s the thought that counts.

Well, they’re wrong. All they’re doing is forcing me to go through a lot of trouble to try and re-sell (or re-gift) their present. By buying something not-on-the-person’s-list, it can cause more headaches than pleasure. Such as people who give you personalized items. With all due respect and utterances of love, why would someone give you a present that you can’t even pawn off on some unsuspecting twit? I always appreciate the thought behind gifts, but it’s not much use to have a puce cross-stitched wall-hanging with my name on it, especially when I have nowhere to hang it except maybe in a closet where I don’t have to look at it.

I’m just not a doilies, crystal, and homemade-decorations type of girl.

I have three dust-catchers I will never get rid of. One is the bobble-head Kuroneko-sama. One is a wooden statue that Dan picked up in Africa and gave to Alex. And the third is a tiki-head Kleenex box where you pull the Kleenex out of his nose.

That is the kind of girl I am. I don’t like knickknacks. I don’t like having to clean under things. I have enough things to clean under as it is.

I do like having a modest stock of scented candles, and I spend most of my time on one of our computers. If someone wants to buy me a nice, thoughtful gift, I suggest that they ask for my Amazon Wishlist and buy me something I want.